Logic Will Break Your Heart

India Web Resources

2011-12-29T06:41:00.000-08:00

Travel:

http://www.makemytrip.com/ - Domestic flight aggregator
http://www.redbus.in/ - Domestic bus aggregator
http://www.olivea.in/ - Luxury bus operator (vetted by my cousin)
http://www.tajhotels.com/ - 5-star luxury hotel chain with superlative service (pricing in Kerala was comparable to a Hilton in American dollars)

Entertainment:

http://www.burrp.com/ - A sort of Yelp/Citysearch for India
http://www.nowrunning.com/ - Indian movie showtimes

Stores:

http://www.fabindia.com/ - Organic soaps, food, and classic Indian clothing made of really beautiful fabric. I'm totally addicted to these stores.
http://www.bibaindia.com/ - On trend women's Indian clothing
http://www.wforwoman.com/ - On trend women's Indian clothing
One can also find some good Indian pieces at the American-style department stores that have sprung up throughout India such as Shoppers Stop, Lifestyle,Westside, and Pantaloon (all seem to be mandated to play bad American top 40 music, funnily enough). However, the western clothing at these stores isn't that great in terms of fit, quality, and style.

Food:

http://www.cafecoffeeday.com/ - India's lamely monikered equivalent to Starbucks (origins in Bangalore). These are ubiquitous and good to duck into when you're hard pressed to find a clean restroom (which is basically anytime you are outside of someone's home).

Mission Impossible : Ghost Protocol

2011-12-28T21:20:00.000-08:00

Checked out this movie last night; it was neat seeing it in India since a portion of the story takes place in Mumbai and briefly features Anil Kapoor (who is turning out to be the go-to Indian actor for Hollywood). Even though the film had limited character development and an uber simple storyline, it was anchored by a series of action set pieces which were varied, thrilling, cleanly choreographed (Michael Bay's thumbprints were nowhere to be found), and elaborate. Also, despite how annoyingly smug he can come across on screen, Tom Cruise remains an appealing and believable action star. A director need only minimize his emotionality and maximize his physicality and he'll do well for them.

Interestingly, Mumbai was only shown in the best light, with the main locations being inside a posh hotel (looked like a a Taj or Oberoi) and a high-tech parking structure. The street scenes took place at night, conveniently obscuring any slums or filth, which other Mumbai-based films like "Salaam Bombay" and "Slumdog Millionaire" didn't shy away from showing.

Even though I'm typically a proponent of Truth, part of me is glad the film showed an edited version of it. Unfortunately, the chaos, crowds, and dirt are the first things to assault your senses upon arrival (at least in the cities) and it's only after having stayed in India for a while that you begin to pick up on the uniqueness and beauty of the culture and land. I know how silly this is going to sound, but if India had a more acceptable infrastructure (implicit in this is a reduction in corruption which would be necessary for this to occur) and a lower population (implicit in this is a resulting increase in the value of an individual life), I would move there in a heartbeat. After all, nowhere else I've been better represents all that is concurrently modern and ancient, eternal, and spiritual.

India currently represents the polarities - the very good with the very bad, and so conveys the full spectrum of life. In the US, the middle and higher classes lead sanitized, comfortable lives (hey, about this I'm not complaining), but the spiritual center is missing.

Asides a la Caffeinated Muslim

Not sure if this is the case with all Indian movie theaters, but...

the soundtrack was played at a DEAFENING volume
there was a 10 minute intermission in the middle of the film
you can ask for your theater food to be served to you in your seat
my uncle picked up his cell in the middle of the movie and started jabbering loudly to a work colleague (I wonder if this is acceptable in India; it very well could be)

Indian Restaurant Names

2011-12-26T02:18:00.000-08:00

"Phobidden Fruit" - Vietnamese restaurant (Bangalore)

"Family Restaurant with Bar" - Your guess is as good as mine (Bangalore)

"Succulent thighs, juicy breasts, and great legs" - The tagline of a restaurant called "Chicken Stop!" (Bangalore). I also found a photo of the shop online: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/home/sunday-toi/signs-of-times/signsgalleryshow/7806862.cms .

...to be continued.

Indian English

2011-12-25T05:35:00.001-08:00

Glares - sunglasses

Goggles - sunglasses (antiquated term)

Windcheater - windbreaker

Cracker - firework

Bus shelter - bus depot

Jumper - an article of clothing which provides warmth, e.g. a jacket or sweater

Speed hump - speed bump

Petrol - gas

Capsicum - bell pepper

Tiffin - snacks

Cinema hall - movie theater

Rumbler - rumble strip

Fresher - newbie

Maestro - Mastercard in India

Geyser - hot water heater (pronounced "geezer")

Gum - glue

...to be continued.

How To Make It In America - The Music

2011-12-13T16:39:00.000-08:00

I've been watching "How To Make It In America" ever since Season 1 Episode 1 aired on HBO. It's one of the few shows that accurately (for me, anyways) captures the spirit and energy of "youthful" New York City. Even though the show has recently taken a turn that I'm not down with, I've always admired its ability to be 2 beats ahead of me in terms of featured music whereas a show like "Glee" is about 2 beats behind. Here are a couple of electronic tracks which introduced the closing credits of recent episodes:

M83 - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDyonn3mQj8
Washed Out - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0HjvLgzMOM

Even though I've always liked M83's singles, the walls upon walls of sound make listening to entire albums of his exhausting.

The Jetlag

2011-12-13T16:19:00.000-08:00

I normally suffer from minimal jetlag after arriving in a foreign country from the States, so I'm not sure why it's been such a chore to shake it off this time. Yesterday, I woke up at 1am local time. This morning, I arose at 3am, so at least things are progressing in the right direction.

Yesterday starting at 1am, I spent 4 hours tossing and turning, my thoughts burning up my energy. Today, I decided to not fight nature and be productive instead. I went online (compliments of my grandma's neighbor who hasn't yet wisened to the fact that my mom and I have been pirating his wi-fi. Thanks "rajaji"; I owe you several), responded to a few e-mails, did some work, finalized some plans, and did some other stuff which I can also describe in vague verbs but will not. I also provided a 5-course meal to the mosquito that was buzzing around unimpeded until I cranked up the ceiling fan to full blast.

The stillness (ravenous mosquitos and howling, roving packs of stray dogs notwithstanding) of early mornings in India is a beautiful thing and I'm glad that I realized it while I had the chance. I can't WAIT until the neighbors start clanging pots and pans, the fishwalla comes calling in his nasal voice, and the shopping center 4 blocks away starts piping music.

The Soundtrack

2011-12-12T20:46:00.000-08:00

These two albums are quickly shaping up to comprise the soundtrack for this trip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdmRgzVKSew
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Olbl_a_UW2g

It's a strange combo, if you think about it.

The Request

2011-12-12T20:17:00.001-08:00

Dearest Hulu and Netflix,

Please get your acts together and procure streaming rights in Asia so that I can cease suffering from network television withdrawal. May I remind you that I asked you to start on this one year ago. (My next letter will not be so polite).

Love Always,
The Bot

The Shoe Store

2011-12-12T19:27:00.001-08:00

I recently discovered that my canvas Toms are ripping in 5 different places, which is not the ideal state for shoes that will soon be used for tourism. Having gargantuan feet, I fully expected to be a shoe pariah in Japan or any other east asian country, but not anywhere else really. So imagine my surprise after being told by a salesperson at a Kolkata Bata that the pair of kicks I had my eye on maxed out at size 7. The salesperson then proceeded to point me towards a selection of clunky men’s sneakers. I await the day I become pregnant, have my feet swell, and then have to start shopping for dress shoes at a store for drag queens.

The Internet Cafe

2011-12-12T19:26:00.000-08:00

Earlier today, my mom and I stopped by an “internet café” which one of my grandma’s neighbors runs out of their home since my mom had to carry out the (one would think) simple task of printing out 2 e-mail attachments. As we entered, I noticed that the place bore the hallmarks of third world jankiness/humility that I typically find endearing: lack of clientele, outdated equipment, monitor stands still encased in plastic, an internet speed allowing one to open e-mails at the rapid pace of 1 every 10 seconds… However, 30 minutes later, the endearment had worn off and annoyance set in. Luckily, 10 minutes after that, we were finally able to print out the e-mails after haphazardly discovering, without any notification whatsoever, that e-mail attachments wouldn’t open until the browser’s pop-up blocker was turned off. Now I understand how the place makes money!

The Sky Train

2011-12-12T19:24:00.000-08:00

Since my connecting flight to India was departing from a different terminal than the one in which I landed, I had to take the Singapore airport monorail to get there. After the next train approached, I stepped into the packed car only to realize that every single person in it was Indian. After I descended, I started noticing how the majority of the people in the airport were Indian, as a matter of fact. Has the combination of the Chinese one child policy and Indian policy of well, doing nothing to curb population growth skewing the global ethnic ratio? Are we slowly taking over the world through sheer number?

The Obvious Advice

2011-12-12T18:55:00.000-08:00

If you can help it, never sit in a middle seat in the last row of an airplane on a long haul flight.

And if you have a small bladder and a propensity to get queasy from turbulence, this applies twofold.